Update on the Praying Toddler

3 months ago, I shared a post on how we teach Yanna to pray and how proud we are of her. This is just an update on her growing knowledge on praying.

In addition to knowing that she has to pray before eating, this time she sees to it that everyone is participating in praying. Or else, your name gets called! LOL! If her lolo is not praying along (even if he already did pray before Yanna sits to eat) she expects him to pray again. To get his attention she calls out "Wowo!" How strict! LOL! She won't start praying unless everyone participates. That's why I'm guessing she'll be a nun someday hihi! 😄

During the mass 4 weeks ago, I whispered that she should raise her hands when singing The Lord's Prayer. To my surprise, she did! It was a proud moment for us. She held her hands up the entire song. But knowing Yanna, expect kulitness to her newfound skill. After that she wants me and hubby to always hold our hands up, along with her, for the rest of the mass songs! Over naman! 😄

Another milestone is that she's starting to memorize some prayers like The Lord's Prayer, Hail Mary & Angel of God. We always pray these before bedtime so she got used to the words. What I do is when we pray, I stop mid-sentence and see if she will say the next word. Sort of like fill in the blanks. To my amazement, she knows the missing words! I just had to hug her tight for that! Little did I expect that a 17-month old can do that.

I'm so happy that she likes praying so much. Whenever she sees the statue of Mama Mary in my in-laws' house, she waves at it and says Hi! Then tells me "Mommy? Pray?" and we pray.

I'm looking forward to see what new things she'll learn the next months. For tips on how to teach toddlers to pray, you may want to check out my post on that too.

Hope you all have a meaningful Holy Week! 😃

Letting Go

In my past posts, I've told everyone how clingy Yanna is to me. It was tough, draining at times, even made me lose weight (the best part of it!). I've been looking forward to the day when she will let other people hold her, carry her and play with her.

Lately, Yanna has been very sociable. Thanks to our long stay with my in-laws here in Bicol. She lets them carry her once in a while but she still clings to me oftentimes. When she sleeps beside me, she no longer needs to nurse all the time when she wakes up at night. She can now soothe herself back to sleep without my help. Such a big improvement!

I should be jumping with joy right? This means more sleep and bed space for me, less tired arms, a little more time to myself. But you know what, I feel a sudden pang in my heart whenever she prefers being carried by my sister-in-law or when she rolls away from me during sleep. This only happened a few times but I'm still bothered. I find myself thinking " Oh my. She's starting to need me less". And I try to hide my dismay over it.

I'm crazy right? This is what I want to happen and now I realize I'm the one having a hard time letting go of my baby. Oh, she's not a baby anymore.

I know I have to let go. She needs to learn independence as she grows older. This is good for her. I need to learn to be independent from her too. I know it will take time. Right now all I want to do is treasure our time together and when she starts clinging again, I will hold her like there's no tomorrow.

Oh, Mama was right!

"You'll understand me when you become a mom yourself".

Those were my mom's favorite line whenever we argue back then. I always shrugged it off and told myself "of course I won't be like her when I become a mom".

Then came our little bundle of joy and all of a sudden, I heard myself saying "Oh, Mama was right!"

I hated how she kept on reminding me "Lock your doors" whenever I ride a car. Must she always say that everytime??? But now I find myself always saying "Careful!" everytime my toddler walks a little bit fast.

I hated how she wanted me to eat vegetables but now I am over the moon whenever my toddler eats hers.

I hated that she worked and didn't have time to attend parents meetings in school but now I know that I'm sure she hated not going too but she had to work so that I can go to school.

I hated that she didn't allow me to go malling with just my friends at the age of 12. Now hearing of kidnapping stories in malls makes me nervous for my toddler eventhough she has me and yaya with her all the time.

I hated that she got angry when she found out I have a boyfriend when I was only 13. Now I realized - Yeah, it really was too early to get into that. I think I'll go hysterical too!

I hated her traditional thinking that suitors/boyfriends should frequently visit me at home and not go out on dates. Now hubby and I are joking that we'll get a big house and if someone wants to date our daughter, they'll have the date in our house. We'll take care of the food hahaha!

So many realizations now that I'm a mom too. This made me appreciate my mom more and it made us closer. I now understand her.

If in the future Yanna and I get into an argument, I know I'll find myself saying...
"You'll understand me when you become a mom yourself". 😉


Mommy May

How to Teach Your Toddler To Pray

90%, if not all, of parents hope that their kids grow up to be good Christians. I hear that wish every time from parents during their kids' birthday parties. So how do we do that and when to start?

In our case, I think we're doing a fine job with it. At 14 months, Yanna can somehow do the sign of the cross, knows that she needs to say a prayer before eating and sleeping, and knows how to pray at Sunday masses. She does the sign of the cross (which is tapping her chest 3x) and clasps her hands. She does this several times during mass. I am at awe everytime she does it.

Here are some tips from our experience:

1. Make it a habit to go to Sunday mass together as a family. As soon as Yanna was baptized, we made sure to always take her to the mass with us. To ensure good behavior from her, we attend mass schedules that are after her nap times. This avoids a cranky little church-goer. Of course there will be times that crying is inevitable. When this happens we take her outside the church first and return inside once she has calmed down. Since going to mass has become part of her Sunday schedule, amazingly, she no longer gets cranky inside the church and is now very well-behaved. She can now finish the mass without fuss. She's very behaved with her hands clasped together in praying position. She even sings! I'd take a photo if only we weren't in church! She's just so adorable!

Ready for mass. Baby Yanna at 3 months.

2. Eat together and say a prayer before meal. We started doing this when Yanna's 6 months old. It is important to eat together as a family to make mealtime fun for her and to teach her how important it is to share a meal with Mom and Dad. We also showed her that we need to pray before eating. At 12 months, we were surprised to see her clasping her hands together while praying. At 13 months, she started saying "Am" for Amen. And now at 14 months, once all three of us are at the table, she will remind us to pray by calling our attention, showing her clasped hands and saying "Am". Just recently, she started doing the sign of the cross (tapping her chest). Sigh, I'm such a proud mom!

3. Include your toddler when you say your bedtime prayers. Moms and Dads, I hope you are still saying your bedtime prayers together. With our fast-paced lives now, I know it's not easy. My hubby does not have a normal 8-5 work schedule so whenever he's still not home during Yanna's bedtime, I make sure that I say my bedtime prayer with Yanna. There are times when Yanna will wait for her dad to come home, and that's the time we pray together as a family. It is very important to make bedtime prayer a habit even at her very young age. Yanna really surprises me. Because she knows that prayer comes before sleeping, there are times when we forget and she reminds us! She would clasp her hands and hold it high up and show us. LOL! To prove to you that she's so into praying, whenever we finish our prayer and say goodnight, she cries! She wants to pray over and over again! LOL! I'll bet she will be able to memorize the prayers by age two at the rate we're going.

Yanna knows a lot of stuff already like trying to say the alphabet, numbers, but knowing the concept of prayer is by far the biggest milestone that she has achieved and we're so proud of being good role models to her.

How about you? What tips can you share? :)

Mommy May

My Short Vacation Trip with Yanna (Part 2)

Day 2 of our trip -- We strolled along the beach early in the morning to catch Mr. Sun. This was the beach we regularly went to when we were still kids. When I was still young, I really enjoyed swimming here, until I discovered Boracay haha! I never thought I'll enjoy this beach again but this time with Yanna, I learned to appreciate it again. This beach was full of childhood memories and now I'm back with my own daughter. Sniff!

Yanna was having some colds then and my mom said that sea water can cure it. You know how grandmothers are. I don't know where they get those ideas! Well, moms know best so I took a handful of sea water and wiped it on Yanna's face. I think I did that 5 times. (Result --- effective!!!)

Before heading home, Yanna had a crying fit again when I left her to take a bath. Her cry was so scary! It's as if she's going to lose her breath! I had to quickly finish my bath. That was not a good bath! Eeww! But a Mom's gotta do what a Mom's gotta do!

At around 10am, we were back in the car to head home but of course, a trip isn't complete without stopping by Tagaytay. We went to Bag of Beans and we were surprised that it's now bigger! The last time I went there was 8 years ago. They now serve buffets and everything in the brunch buffet menu was absolutely delicious! If I remember it correctly, it costs PhP 385/person.

 Lots of saffron rice for me! Breastfeeding eh! 

Chloe shows some love. They're so sweet together!

Yanna's really happy :)

 With my sister and her Chloe. I think Yanna adores her Ate Chloe. 

We stayed at Bag of Beans for close to 2 hours! The place is so relaxing and we kept on getting food! Yanna was very cooperative this time so I got to eat a lot! Breastfeeding really makes me hungry!

The drive home went smoothly. Yanna dozed off by herself again while watching her fave video in the car. As I looked outside the window, I can't help but smile. I knew that I did really well. I was glad that I had this yaya-less experience. I have proven myself worthy to be a mom. 

Yanna can be a challenge sometimes but my love for her makes me stronger, wiser and happier. In my quest to mold Yanna into a good person that I want her to be, I realized that she also molds me into a better mom that I can be.

Cheers to more future trips with Yanna! I am so ready!!! :)

Mommy May

How Not To Go Crazy

When Yanna was still a baby, it took me several months to really get the hang of it. Breastfeeding, changing diapers, soothing a crying baby and putting her to sleep --- physically and emotionally draining! I had to try different techniques to make life easier but just when I figured it all out, she's not a baby anymore!

I'm starting to miss those baby days. This is Yanna at 3 months :)

Now enter toddlerhood. It's a whole new story again! Yanna's smarter, more active but still clings to me like glue. She now demands more from me and she has the right to do so. Toddlerhood can sometimes be very scary for the little ones because they're stuck in the middle --- they want to gain more independence but at the same time, they still need us.

The newbie toddler :)

There were lots of times when I just want to scream!!!

When Yanna's making such a mess when eating or when she refuses to eat...

When I feel immobilized because she breastfeeds so many times in a day (I don't think she's hungry. More on getting comfort from me.)...

When all I can watch are baby DVDs (I've memorized the songs!)

And when she cries whenever I just need to go to the bathroom.

She can sometimes drive me insane! How can such a small person do that to me? I love her to bits but sometimes a mom just really needs a break. But we moms know that sometimes that's not possible so the best thing we can do is control ourselves since those little people can always argue that they're innocent. ( I miss being a kid! )

To save me from being a mad, crazy mom, these are the things I do.

1- I take a very deep breath! I don't want to show her that I'm mad since usually it's not her fault. It's my fault for losing my patience. Maybe it was just a tiring day for me.

2- Kiss and hug. I may be really frustrated but I manage to still kiss and hug her. Touch has its calming effect. Yanna often smiles when I do this. She knows I'm a softy whenever she smiles.

3- I ask for help. When Steps 1 & 2 won't work, I ask for help either from hubby or yaya. I leave Yanna with them and isolate myself in another room until I am calm. Sometimes I just need a short break. During isolation, I begin to miss Yanna and then I forget why I'm mad in the first place.

I've read from books that it is normal to feel this way. Thank God, I'm still normal! With the high expectations that moms place on themselves, it's no wonder why moms sometimes get easily frustrated. Others even break down. Every mom has her own way of coping with the frustration and these three steps proved to be helpful to me.

As I'm writing this now, Yanna is throwing a fit again. Now time to do Step 1 :)

How about you mommies? What do you do to stay sane? Do share! :)

Mommy May

My Short Vacation Trip with Yanna (Part 1)

The last time I visited the cemetery was 2008. Working for a BPO and shared services companies, I had to work even during All Saints Day. Pathetic, right? Now that I'm a full-time mom, it's just right that I give time to pay my respect to my departed grandparents. Well, actually, there's more to that!

My mom and sister were asking if I will join them to visit the cemetery. At first, I declined because the cemetery is in Nasugbu, Batangas. Hubby cannot join because he has work. I have no transportation. If  I'm going to travel with Yanna's yaya, we won't fit in my sister's car. So I decided not to join them again this year. Maybe next year, when Yanna's already two.

That same day at home, Yanna and I were watching her favorite DVD "Things That Go Counting" while Yaya was in her room ironing some clothes. We were happily singing and dancing along the songs. Yanna loves fidgeting with the remote so I hid it under a blanket behind me. Two minutes after that, the DVD ended so Yanna was looking for the remote. Knowing that I hid it well, I was so confident that she won't find it until I saw her face lit up. I followed her gaze and lo and behold! The remote was sitting on top of the blanket!!! I was so stunned for a minute! How did this happen? What's going on??? I swear I hid it under the blanket! I double checked when I did that!!!

Then I remembered my mom's text after I said I won't be joining them: "Okay. Just light a candle para di sila magtampo". Uh-oh! Okay, okay, I'm going!!!

I immediately texted my sister that I will be joining them overnight. But how about Yanna? I don't want to leave her especially since we're still breastfeeding. Oh well, I decided to take Yanna with me --- without hubby (He has work!) and without yaya (No space for her in the car.). Uh-oh! First time to go on a trip without yaya or hubby. Well good luck to me!

In my past post, I wrote about Yanna being very shy/clingy. She only wants ME all the time. So before the trip, I have prepared myself for the tiring tasks. I'm sure even with her grandparents, tito and ninang around, she'll only want to go with me. I keep telling myself: You can do this May! This is a test of how good a mom you are! Well, I was up to the challenge. Bring it on!!!

The day of the trip came. The travel by car was fine since my sister's car has "Things That Go Counting" DVD playing on the car TV. Yanna was well-behaved. She even dozed off by herself. Aaahhh so far so good, Mommy May!

 Before the trip

We had lunch at Kainan Sa Dalampasigan, owned by one of our wedding ninangs. The place is so beautiful!!! If ever you're in Nasugbu, do try their delicious food especially their halo-halo!

Yanna and Chloe had fun running (walking in Yanna's case) around the place. It's so nice to see Yanna having fun with her cousin.

Yanna bonding with her cousin Chloe

As predicted, Yanna won't let me out of her sight. She cried when she realized that I'm gone (I need to eat for heaven's sake!) and realized that it's grandma holding her hand. I wasn't able to eat well. Poor me! Just when the shrimps are so good!!!

Here's a photo of a tired mommy :p

The good thing about this whole situation is that I had the chance to be babied again by my mom. Hihi! She had to feed me while I carry Yanna. It was so funny! Three generations... motherly love being passed on.

What a sight! LOL!

We visited the cemetery late afternoon. We forgot that the sun sets earlier nowadays and before we knew it, it was pitch black! We went there Oct 31 so there were only a few people there and very few lamp posts. Kinda spooky! After saying our prayers, we went back to the resort and rested.

For Day 1, it was a good day overall. Bedtime went well except for her crying fit while I took a shower. She even threw up because she was crying so hard. No one was able to console her, until she saw me got out of the bathroom. Sigh!

But this day was fun! A little tiring but nothing I can't handle.

Not bad, Mommy May! Not bad at all! :)


Mommy May

MYTH: Being A Full-Time Mom is Easy

I know most people think that being a full-time mom is a no-brainer. That all she does is play with her kids, cook meals, and keep the house tidy. As if those tasks are easy! Some even say "Nasa bahay ka lang naman" or "Wala ka namang ginagawa". What? Excuse me!

I've been a working girl for 12 years and when I became a full-time mom, I discovered that same as working, it entails a lot of thinking, time management and continuous improvement. The hardest part of it all --- a full-time mom gets no pay for it (except for those luckier and wealthier moms) and being a mom does not end after 8 hours.

If you're one of the big percentage of women wishing to just stay home, thinking that it's just all about playing with your kids, shopping, having your nails done while kids are at school, I'm sorry to break your bubble. It's far from that. How I wish that's possible but in my case, I hardly even have time to get my nails done or brush my hair!

My typical day involves breastfeeding, thinking of what nutritious food to serve the little one, bathing her, changing diapers and clothes, looking for ways to entertain her, singing and dancing with her (this becomes tiring after 5x of replay of the same Sesame Street videos haha!), putting her to sleep at nap times (which is becoming difficult during toddler's age since she likes to play and play and play), reading her stories, teaching her the alphabet, colors, shapes, animals, etc.

Then there's the household to think about. I admit I am not such a domesticated woman. I grew up with helpers assisting with my needs. This is the tough part for me. I don't really do the household chores since Yanna's yaya is also all-around but I need to make sure that she does the chores correctly. Being the hands on mom that I am, the yaya now has less "yaya tasks". I think I'm making some progress here because this week I made her a list and schedule of household chores and I just need to check whether she follows it. As for cooking, I sometimes try to cook based on recipes I like and serve them to hubby and I wait for the verdict haha! I hope hubby notices the effort I make but I have to admit I still have a lot to learn!

There are times when I find this to be a thankless job. Unlike in the corporate world where people are being evaluated by metrics based on a more or less permanent set of tasks, a full time mom does not have that. A lot more is expected as a mom and wife and right now I don't think I pass those with flying colors. Everyday is a struggle and I hope that soon I can say that I'm a Super Mom :)

When I feel blue, I just look at my daughter and just one smile from her makes everything worth the struggle. So to those moms who can relate, I'm leaving you Yanna's gigil smile to perk you up! :)

Mommy May

What Breastfeeding Taught Me

When Yanna was born, I decided to exclusively breastfeed only for the first 6 months to give her ample nutrition that she needs. The first 2 weeks were difficult. Yanna's latching was poor and so I had cracked nipples and it was VERY painful feeding her. I remember myself crying and practically begging my hubby to permit me to stop breastfeeding. He got mad and told me to endure it for the sake of the baby. My exact thoughts that very moment: "OMG he loves the baby more than me! Siya kaya ang mag breastfeed!!!" As usual, the obedient wife that I am, I endured the pain. I was crying helplessly whenever Yanna feeds. I felt pity for me. I thought breastfeeding is supposed to be a very lovely moment between mom and baby but why is it so difficult???

Then I realized, this is what Motherhood is! Being able to sacrifice for the sake of your precious little one. Gone are the self glorifying days from Day 1 of Motherhood. As soon as I learned that lesson, it lessened the pain until we were able to breastfeed smoothly. Now I am very glad that hubby insisted on it because at 5 months, Yanna was hospitalized for pneumonia. I remember how stressed I was when hubby called me at work to let me know of the diagnosis. I immediately left the office to take care of her. I was puzzled thinking that I have been exclusively breastfeeding her but why did she get pneumonia? Doctor said that it's not 100% illness-free with breastfeeding but a breastfed child's illness will only take a shorter time. This was true since Yanna was only hospitalized for 2.5 days and she was still very energetic during her hospital stay. It could've been worse if she was not breastfed.

So I continued giving her breastmilk beyond 6 months. At work, my breastpump is my best friend. Pumping milk is such a task especially if you're always busy at work! I had to squeeze it in my busy schedule. I'm glad that my boss and officemates then were supportive of it. A support group like that is very key for a working mom to continue milk pumping.

I'm glad to say that I have been breastfeeding her for 13 months now. I consider that as my achievement as a mom because I know how difficult it is! I'm just really lucky to have a very supportive husband, family and friends who kept me inspired to continue on. So what lessons have I learned from our breastfeeding journey? I learned patience, selflessness, time management and I learned to love this demanding, biting, clingy and chubby little sucker :)

For breastfeeding tips, you may read: http://www.askdrsears.com/?q=topics/breastfeeding.

Mommy May